basically, the roles have reversed in my relationship once I eventually gave in and began to trust my mate. It takes me an incredibly long time to trust people since I was a kid and we toughed through my aloofness only for me to end up getting crapped on. Positive reinforcement would have been key at this juncture.
back to square one. I don't really think I can put my heart in anyone's hands again. they always squeeze too tight or let it slip away.